Improper Office Conduct (based on If It Weren't The Heart)
by distressingdisneydamsel
Summary: Secret office sex conspires between Elsa and Hans, a new couple at work with a complicated past. Hans manages to find a way to manipulate her into sleeping with him, only to discover he forgot to even bring condoms. It starts off with suggestive texts and continues in the storage room with inexperienced hand jobs and fingering. Modern AU One Shot Helsa/Hansla/Iceburns. NSFW smut.


AN: (All AN I ever make are optional to read.) Because this was requested from my other fic by more than 1 person in the comments on this site, I decided to comply (even though I never planned to write this.) Since "If It Weren't The Heart" is an office AU, I'm assuming you wanted office sex, but this is kind of a quickie. It seemed more realistic to me for it to be that way in an office setting. You don't have to read this to understand "If It Weren't The Heart" and vice versa. It doesn't really affect the plot at all. This could easily read as a one shot. For the sake of it making sense to readers of IIWTH, I imagine this happened in the period where Hans and Elsa started dating officially around the beginning of chapter 20. In that chapter, it kind of skips a little bit of the beginning of their official relationship, so I'd imagine that this scene would happen during the ambiguous time that was skipped. Warning: this is totally +18 material. Story begins after the line.

* * *

Since early morning at work, Hans sat across from Elsa. He would flit his eyes up at her between breaks in reading documents, and Elsa would bite her lip as she noticed his attention. She could tell her boyfriend purposely wanted to distract her, so she turned her head away and leaned on her arm. With her back facing him, she finally felt able to focus on what she wrote. Her blue pen swirled the cursive letters on the page but paused when she heard her cellphone vibrate on her black desk. She slid the cellphone in her vision close enough for it to appear like she was still working, while she actually read her text messages. She leered at the screen, noticing Hans was the culprit who interrupted her focus.

...

10:30 AM Hans: Can't focus on work. Already thinking about seeing u 2night.

...

Elsa accusingly glimpsed over her shoulder in his direction only to find he suspiciously invested in typing on his computer's keyboard, unwilling to admit via eye contact what he'd just sent her. He knew she didn't allow distractions from her duties. She slowly turned back to the papers on her desk, engrossing herself in her writing. Noon came before he sent another text message. She didn't realize how bored she grew, until she eagerly reached for her cellphone to read his newest message.

...

12:00 PM Hans: Hey, remember that time we got drunk at ur place?

...

A salacious reminder. The very mention of that moment caused her already pale face to whiten, embarrassed by the impure memory popping in her head. Despite the couple never engaging in sex before, their behavior on the night he reminisced about certainly wasn't innocent. She flipped the ivory page to continue her documentation, but the shaking in her hands gave away the affect he had on her. More time drifted when her cellphone vibrated once more. This time, she dared to answer him.

...

3:15 PM Hans: I'm so distracted rn, & it's all ur fault

3:16 PM Elsa: It's a good thing you sit far away from me, or you and I would be trouble for each other.

3:16 PM Hans: Send pics ;)

3:16 PM Elsa: We're supposed to be working...

3:16 PM Hans: Plz?

3:16 PM Hans: Just 1

3:16 PM Hans: At least

...

Elsa glanced from side to side, carefully tilting her cellphone vertical. She never broke rules before, and she was learning how fun it could feel. Knowing he wanted risqué selfies, she decided to toy with him by giving him the most appropriate photo she could muster. Elsa ran her fingers above her bunned hair, smoothing down any stray hairs. She adjusted her navy-blue blazer, straightened her spine, smiled sweetly, and snapped a head shot. She text it to him, shocked by how promptly he replied.

...

3:17 PM Hans: U look like ur running for president in this pic

3:17 PM Elsa _:_ Good.

3:17 PM Hans: I'd still fuck u

3:17 PM Hans: The second I get u alone, I'm ripping ur clothes off

3:17 PM Hans: Ud look so good on top of me

3:17 PM Elsa: Secret service wouldn't like this at all.

...

She dropped her cellphone and placed the end of her blue pen between her teeth, watching him steal peeks at her. As much as she hated to admit it to herself, she found this side of him lively and amusing. He swiveled his black, leather chair to the side, as if he wanted to skip the playful texts and march straight over to her. Other coworkers sat at their own desks nearby, making privacy nonexistent. He didn't move at all, but only watched her coyly nibble on her long pen. He couldn't help but imagine the writing utensil in her small, doll-like mouth as something else. She stood up, stretched her arms, and pressed her paperwork to her full bosoms. She strolled past his desk and into the backroom where they stored everything. His head turned, as she sauntered away. She closed the metal, heavy door behind her, separating her from the rest of the office. Until she reached a tall, grey filing cabinet, Elsa tip-toed between unopened, brown, paper packages on the floor. She opened the metal drawer, flipping to the letter J. She pulled out a pale-yellow file. Facing the cabinet, she plopped her papers into the folder. Suddenly, the bulky slam of the backroom door echoed, causing Elsa to jump. She whipped her body around to see Hans zig-zagging around the debris on the floor. The backroom was typically organized, yet today the objects around the room sat out-of-place. Surplus of new shipments, she figured. Elsa shyly covered her excitement with the file. Only her big, sky-blue eyes peered above to see the handsome man alone with her.

"Why did you follow me?" Elsa giggled loudly. He could tell she was smiling from the way her eyes squinted.

"Shh, be quiet. I don't want anyone out there to hear us. I just wanted to see you," he reasoned.

"Well I'm busy," she teased. He snatched the file away from her, exposing her grin. Her fists balled up and tucked under her chin, missing having an object to hide behind. He tossed the file on a long table towards the center of the backroom. Thinking it was a game, Elsa tried to step past him to retrieve her much needed paperwork. He grabbed her by her waist and pressed her back against his chest. He aspired to keep her from her work. She bent forward and shielded her stomach with her arms, afraid he'd tickle her.

"Don't distract me," she humored. He quickly spun her around by her shoulders to face him, making her slightly dizzy.

"We have to be quiet, remember?" He hushed her with a kiss on her forehead that landed on her bangs. "God, you have no idea what I want to do to you," he warned. Though his lips did look inviting, she rolled her shoulders to motion him to let her go, and he complied.

"Not here, Hans," She tilted her head to the side to spot the file behind the tall, young man.

"C'mon on. I could even-"

"Nothing's happening."

"You're killing my ego here. You keep shooting everything I say down," Hans groaned, disappointed that she couldn't care less about his sexual frustration. "No one can even see us back here. Break the rules for once. Just let me show you..." He pulled her closer, carefully watching her timid expression to see if he was allowed. Although he preferred her hair when it cascaded freely, he felt thankful that her bun exposed her graceful neck. He kissed her neck serenely and idly dragged his hands down her body, as if the sluggish speed would cause the strict girl not to notice. It always felt easier to kiss her anywhere but on her lips. Her mouth was the first place she guarded from him, but Hans could think of a few places she should watch out for instead. She managed to remain still except for one shiver. In the past, she never granted him permission to venture beyond innocent interactions with her, so from time-to-time, he'd attempt to do so on his own. She normally moaned so easily when he would touch her, and it agitated him that she barely even blinked now. Wanting a bigger reaction out of her, he caressed her round ass through her skirt then unmercifully spanked her as hard as he could. Her body jolted forward onto him from the force.

She squealed, "Ow! I don't think..."

"Don't think," he suggested hotly into her neck. His tight grasp never leaving her freshly spanked bottom. He pulled his mouth away and sternly asserted, "You've been acting like a perfect lady all day. Stop it. Do something offensive."

"But we're in a public place. What if someone came in?"

"Nobody's coming back here," he said in a disinterested tone. She could tell she bored him.

"You don't know that for fact," she logically calculated.

"You're no fun."

"I am, too! We're just at work, so I can't," Elsa defensively corrected. She wasn't one to back down from a challenge, no matter the sort. She felt the need to prove there was more to her than her ethical status and that she wasn't lame or unexciting. "Remember that time I skipped work for an _entire_ day? I didn't even call in!"

"Forget it." Hans released her and rubbed his forehead with his palm. "You're _merely_ a good girl, and I just have to except it."

"I can be bad," she protested. "I can be _really_ , really bad."

"Mhm," he purposely ignored. He crossed his arms, acting inattentive. Her mind raced over evidence she could use to prove her insurgence. There was that time she once ran away from home, and even that time she and Anna disobeyed their parents' rules to build snowmen... back when she was eight years old. None of these stories were usable. She realized she never did anything rebellious in her life. She hated being in charge all the time, mindful of her own behavior. Taught to self-blame at a very young age due to the life threatening accident with her baby sister, she constantly felt the need to prove she wasn't a villain. Thus, her permanent good girl status was born. Even more than that, she struggled with proving she could be ordinary and carefree just as much any normal twenty-something girl. She wanted to be like others girls, and do what other girls do, and be as free as other girls get to be. Her memories piled up like bad, unwanted friends. It occurred to her that most of her regrets were not mistakes, but things she never had the chance to do. She _was_ tired of being prim and perfect. She _was_ tired of being Elsa.

"Don't think that I _can't_ be spontaneous!"

He shrugged, "I didn't disagree." Something about the way he said it made her blood boil. She couldn't have her feelings and authenticity as a person dismissed the way it had been all these years. She wanted to be allowed to be over emotional, obnoxious, and mentally unscarred like Anna. She couldn't forgive herself for all of the years of her life she lost while locked inside her bedroom in her youth. She felt betrayed by her overly confined heart. She wanted right then and there to cut it out of her ribs and restart. Vexed and hurt, she finally snapped.

"I changed my mind. Let's do it. Kiss me," she ordered, no longer caring that they were in an unromantic, crowded storage room surrounded by dusty shelves. The guilt he began to feel for manipulating her drifted away once he realized it worked. He wouldn't make her beg for it twice. Feeling rushed by the urgency in her voice, he bent down and kissed her lips. She, more forcefully than anticipated, hooked onto the lapels of his grey suit jacket. Without breaking their kiss, she started to stumble backwards and yanked him with her. He abruptly eliminated his gentle treatment towards her by bouncing her against an empty space on the wall with a small thud. There came a glimmer in her delicate eyes that told him she liked this rough treatment. He couldn't believe it. She usually portrayed herself as angelic and chaste. With her messy, golden hair unraveling from her bun, and her venereal attitude... that perfect girl was gone. He kissed her harder once more, teeth accidentally clashing. Her flexible right leg raised up, bent at the knee, and hooked around his hips. One of his arms held her raised thigh against his body. Her navy-blue pencil skirt slid higher due to her legs being so far apart. When she felt his free hand latch onto her left, firm breast, she smiled against his kiss. This felt like it was the only way she could redeem herself.

"Elsa?" He pulled his face away, but she refused to stop. Her lips found their way to a sensitive spot on his neck that caused him to lose his train of thought momentarily. He wanted to be inside of her so badly, and there wouldn't be a time easier than this. Perhaps, in some way, it would be good for her to have a little erotic distraction. He cleared his throat, still ashamed of his deception, "How far did you, uh, want us to go?"

"Shut up, and don't stop," she bossed against his skin. She shed his jacket onto the ground and unbuttoned the first two buttons of his shirt. He laced his finger through her freshly freed hair. He tugged the platinum strands, tilting her head to the side. His pointed nose brushed up her exposed neck before he lightly bit a spot behind her ear. He let out a guttural growl when her hand slipped between his legs. His voice alone easily aroused her. He wanted to taste every inch of her, and it bothered him that his mouth could only be at one place at a time. Except for their heavy breathing, they did a fair job at staying quiet. He surveyed the metal door behind him to clarify their privacy then turned back towards her. She tugged at his belt, eyes closed and lips latched onto him. He thought of reminding her that she didn't have to go any further with him, but he vigorously wanted her to inappropriately touch him. She unbuckled his belt, but oddly left it in place. Having enough teasing to last a life time, he removed the belt and unzipped his pants himself. He tossed the belt on the floor with a _clanking_ sound. She paused and pulled away when she noticed what was coming next. Leaning his straightened arms over her shoulders, Elsa's heart raced. She could see a faint, misty layer of sweat starting to blanket his skin. He took one of her elegant hands and guided it to rest on his abs over his shirt. Both of them watched the locomotion of their fingers move past the grooves of his muscled stomach and slip under his boxers. She was inarticulate and too petrified to move her fingers on her own. He cupped her hand around the base of his cock. It was too thick for her fingers to fully encircle and touch on the other side. His hand lethargically pulled hers to stroke its stiff length. She let out a squeak when she accidentally touched his fleshy balls. She could feel a vein traveling down his smooth member. Her other fist tucked under her chin, uncertain of how to properly fondle him. His erection strained in his pants, forced to stick to the inside of his thigh with no space to go anywhere else. She could see the very outline of it. With little room left in his trousers, Elsa found she couldn't really play with it the way she knew he wanted her to. As frightened as she felt, a part of her did want to explore his body. His hand left hers and replaced itself on the wall above her.

"I, uh, I can't really..." She stammered.

"Take it out," he gruffly whispered.

"What!? No! What if someone came in!? I'm not!" She whisper-screamed. In the mist of her rant, she'd accidentally clutched his cock more tightly than she intended. He let out a moan that she almost mistook as pain from the way she squeezed him. It occurred to her that he liked it when she did it. She experimentally dragged her grip to the base then tightly yanked his manhood as far down his restricting clothes as she could go. His flushed face informed her of the results, so she repeated it several times. She adored this control she had over him, as he instinctually bucked his hips into her grasp. For once, he was speechless, except for a few more pleasure induced noises that escaped his throat. She could hear the stagger in his inhaling. His chest accelerating its rising and falling. He bit his lip and watched her wrist disappear farther into his pants, finding her way to the hidden edge of his cock. Her thumb pet the sensitive tip. Another moan came, as a response. She pulled her hand out of his trousers before he could reach a climax. Leaning his arms against the wall, he exhaled shuttering hot air repeatedly to recover. He kissed her once more, rewarding her. It wasn't a perfect hand job, but it was impressive considering she was a virginal first-timer. He lifted her up onto him, and her legs wrapped around his hips. Her pelvis pushed against the bulge in his pants. Her skirt bunched high on her thighs. He carnally carried her past the packages to the sturdy table in the center of the room and sat her on it. He swept some of the excess papers on the table onto the floor. He couldn't take it any longer. Still standing between her legs, he searched his pockets for a condom. He grew more impatient, disappointed that even his wallet lacked any. Making love in an office setting was a fantasy. This was his chance to finally have sex with the girl of his dreams, and he didn't even have a condom.

"What's wrong?" She shed her blazer and flung it on the floor. She brushed her fallen hair away from her eyes and let the wavy strands dangle against her spine.

"Nothing," he dismissed. He felt like it would be impossible to explain he wanted to straddle her and have his way with her on a dirty table without it sounding too crass to the polite, pure girl. Writing those desires over text message felt much easier than having to say it to someone's beautiful face. He sheepishly planned on doing the deed without any words exchanged, but alas, no protection. Besides, there were other ways they could still get each other off. He ran his palms along the see-through, nude fabric on her legs. Great. Now she was wearing clingy tights that guarded her crotch from him. He'd slept with girls, who wore tights, before. He hated the confusing process of trying to remove the tangley, sticky fabric from a woman's skin. Tights became his mortal enemy when it came to intimacy.

"Ugh. Why'd you have to wear tights today, Els?"

"These aren't tights. They're hold-ups," she said factually.

"What? I don't know what that is." He had to stop himself from rudely lifting up her skirt to see what she was talking about. She propped her arms behind her body.

She shyly defined, "Oh, um. Stockings without suspenders. They're stockings that hold themselves up, basically. It's kind of like tights, but it stops at the top of my thighs. I find them more comfortable." Not caring about their functionality, he smirked at the liberating discovery. He took her left, black, high-heeled foot in his hand, holding her foot by the arch. He then supported her calf, lifting the leg towards him. Her pale cheeks turned pink, as he kissed his way from her ankle to her knee. He then moved his hands up her cool thigh, stopping once he found edge of her flimsy stocking. He pushed her submissive thighs apart and leaned up to kiss her hungry, lipsticked lips. She shivered in both anticipation and fear for the unknown. She almost felt obligated to say something, but she didn't know what she could possibly talk about in a moment like this. Her eyes closed during their kiss to reduce her nervousness. Unaware that he snuck his hand under her navy skirt, her breath hitched when he rubbed his hand against the front of her panties. He could feel the lacy texture against his fingertips. After a few more minutes, he adjusted her lavender, lacy underwear to the side and slid his hands underneath it, touching her blonde curls. Her eyes burst open, and she recoiled her face away bashfully. Making eye contact with her, he slipped his middle finger between her slippery folds. A single droplet of her aroused juices dripped down her thigh. Her mouth parted, and she swallowed dryly.

"What a bad girl. You're already wet," he said in a deepened voice, sounding proud of her. He assumed it'd take more foreplay to get her this excited, but she appeared ready already. He glided his finger to the top of her wetness and rolled it against her sensitive, pink pearl, evoking a lustful whine from her. The sensation caused her thighs to try to clamp shut around his hips, but he pushed her legs apart with his free hand once more. Without a warning, he lowered his middle finger and pushed it deep inside of her entrance, brushing against her tight walls. She felt warm and cushioning inside.

"Hans!" She gasped loudly. He paused his hand, not moving while inside her.

"Are you okay?" He asked. Her voice sounded so panicked, he worried he might have done something wrong. He'd done this so many times, he felt sure of himself earlier.

"I-I'm f-fine," she quivered.

"Do you want me to keep..."

"Yeah," she nodded. He shifted his weight on each leg, adjusting to a more comfortable stance. He glanced between her pelvis and her nervous face, until she nodded again. Elsa draped her arms around his shoulders, tucking her face into the crook of his neck. He carefully, cautiously thrust his finger inside of her. Her breasts heaved, as if there wasn't enough oxygen in the world to reduce the heat he made her feel. He kept going, her body almost rocking with his rhythm. He held her voluptuous waist, satisfied that he could get this reaction out of her. She wanted him and knowing that only made his animalistic desires stronger. More whimpers sounded from her, and he could tell she lost herself in the moment with each second passing.

"Shh, be more quiet," he reminded with a shaky breath. He peered behind her at the door, anxious about the idea of a coworker walking in on them. There was no way they could possibly justify this. She gritted her teeth the faster he pulsed inside of her. He could tell she came close to peaking. Her high-pitched voice squeaked higher and higher. Unexpectedly, she let go of him and leaned back on her elbows. Balancing upright became too difficult for her. She felt too antsy to stay still. She spread her legs further apart on her own, no longer wishing to prevent him from getting too deep inside of her. Abruptly, his hand slid out of her panties, tormenting her unintentionally. She didn't understand why he'd quit and in her sexual frustration, she almost demanded him to get back inside of her. He stuck his middle finger and index finger in his mouth. She wasn't sure, if he was tasting her or trying to relubricate his fingers. The sight of him sucking on her juices only turned her on more, causing her eyebrows to meet in a worried expression. It felt excruciating to have to watch him lick his himself clean without her passionate needs being met. She ached for him. He pulled his fingers out of his mouth with a _pop_. He then returned his much missed hand inside her panties and added both fingers inside of her, stretching her insides. His thrusts became sharper and more rapid. Her jaw opened, her eyes closed, and an intense moan emitted. She arched her back, grabbing the edge of the table with her fists. He could feel her walls tighten, and her legs buckled around his hand. Alarmed by her loudness, he used his free hand to cover her mouth. A muffled groan came against his palm. Eventually her body fell motionless. Hans let go of the blonde's mouth to let her catch her breath. Once again, he reentered his Elsa-flavored fingers into his mouth and swiftly pulled them out.

"Sorry, I tried to be quiet but..." she embarrassingly added, cheeks still blushed from her arousal. She might have been sorry, but he wasn't. He hoped to see her naughty side again, screams and all. He helped her sit up, and she seemed physically exhausted from their display. Her legs dangled off the table tranquilly. She rested her head against his chest, weakly. He held her in his arms, patting her back.

"We've been gone for a while. We should head back out there before anyone connects the dots," Hans replied, wondering if his coworkers heard their sensual cries.

Elsa admitted, "Okay, but in a second. I don't think I can walk right now." It was the truth, and she didn't want to wobble on her post-orgasmic legs in front of the whole office. His hug around her grew stronger, compressing her worn out body against him. She looked like she could use a nap from all the energy she lost. This wasn't how he imagined their first sexual act to go down, but he certainly wasn't disappointed. He made a mental note to stock a bunch of condoms in his wallet the second he got home, just in case they ever got frisky at work again.

"Hans?"

"Mhm?"

"Did I... Did I do it right? You know, all that... stuff?"

"Yeah," he softly murmured.

She matched his dreamy tone, "I love you."

"I love you, too."


End file.
